Monday, February 12, 2007
There Is No Blame; There Is Only Love - NPR essay by Ann Karasinski
You don't expect your child to grow up to be a heroin addict. From the moment of her birth, you have hopes and dreams about the future, but they never include heroin addiction. That couldn't happen to your child, because addiction is the result of a bad environment, bad parenting. There is most definitely someone or something to blame.
That's what I used to believe. But after failed rehab and long periods of separation from my heroin-addicted daughter, after years of holding my breath, waiting for another relapse, I now believe there is no blame.
After Katie admitted her addiction, I struggled to understand how this could have happened to my daughter — a bright, beautiful, talented and most importantly, loved young woman.
...
Katie and I meet for breakfast on Friday mornings now. We drink coffee and talk. I don't try to heal her. I just love her. Sometimes there is pain and sorrow, but there is no blame. I believe there is only love.
You don't expect your child to grow up to be a heroin addict. From the moment of her birth, you have hopes and dreams about the future, but they never include heroin addiction. That couldn't happen to your child, because addiction is the result of a bad environment, bad parenting. There is most definitely someone or something to blame.
That's what I used to believe. But after failed rehab and long periods of separation from my heroin-addicted daughter, after years of holding my breath, waiting for another relapse, I now believe there is no blame.
After Katie admitted her addiction, I struggled to understand how this could have happened to my daughter — a bright, beautiful, talented and most importantly, loved young woman.
...
Katie and I meet for breakfast on Friday mornings now. We drink coffee and talk. I don't try to heal her. I just love her. Sometimes there is pain and sorrow, but there is no blame. I believe there is only love.
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